Complexity of Gender

THIS GUY IS PRETTY ENTERTAINING

The Gender Book

http://www.thegenderbook.com/#

Wow go to the link above and look at the booklet. This is a great infographic about the world of gender. really really Good.

Brilliant post by Melissa Fabello that I found on Adios Barbie  Adios Barbie is sort of the one stop body image shop

By Melissa A. Fabello 

As a sex educator with a specialization in body image, I receive a lot of anonymous messages in my Tumblr inbox from people wanting to know if their body is “good enough” for sex.

Will my boyfriend be disgusted if my breasts are uneven? How small is “too small” for a penis? How do I get over the fear of my body jiggling when I’m on top?

And overwhelmingly, increasingly:

Is my vagina dirty? How do I know if my vagina looks/smells/tastes right? Can I use soap “down there?” Or perfume or deodorant or douches? Should I shave? Should I get surgery?

It’s exhausting.

Believing strongly in comprehensive sex education – that is, that everyone deserves access toall information – I find these questions tremendously difficult to answer. On the one hand, I have to be honest with my followers and let them know the truth about how their body works and which “solutions” to their “problems” exist and are safe. But I also need to steer them in the right direction toward body-positivity. I give them their answers, but I also make sure to explain that the real problem is the one that’s inside of their head – that the voice nagging that their bodies just aren’t right is what’s really wrong.

That’s not the answer that they’re looking for. But it’s the truth.

Part of teaching people to accept, own, and respect their bodies and the bodies of others is helping them to unlearn the social myths that they’ve been sold and to provide accurate information about their bodies. So, for women with vaginas*, here’s a primer that outlines four myths that keep us from loving our vulvas – and from loving ourselves.

CLICK HERE to read more

Fantastic Infopak called Vagina and Vulva; Your guide to your Va-Jay-Jay

Fantastic Images and interesting as well.: Thanks to sincitysexblog for this and to all the tumblrs who have passed this on.


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Hard Choice for a Hard landing

Relationships, Sex, Sexual health are hard enough to figure out at the best of times. What about people who have long term 'worst of times'?

Below is a great description of one person's struggle with relationships while living with Bipolar disorder. Hope fully this may be useful to you or someone you are working with.

Thanks to  By TANA WOJCZUK FROM The New York Times for this.

I discovered I was bipolar right around the time I found the love of my life. I met Xander while still on the off-ramp of a miserably failed relationship, a broken engagement that was, while not tragic, the icing on the cake. By this point I had begun introducing myself to future boyfriends as a “serial monogamist” (they always thought I was joking).

Like clockwork, I would go from passionate love and early moving-truck syndrome to screaming and crying fights right around the 2 1/2-year mark. For me, it wasn’t the 7-year itch but the 3-year panic. The relationship would come to a crashing end when I would enter the suspicion phase (not just jealousy but suspicion that the person I’d hitched my wagon to was trying to undermine me at every turn).

TO READ MORE CLICK HERE

GoAnimate: Free easy to use animator

A cute little animator that you can use to make fun scenarios: Here is one of my first demo's.


Paula and Dave and SHineSA by Lud Allen on GoAnimate

Lovely Video from NICHE ( National Institute for Challenging Homophobia)

Friend Zoned

Maybe you don't know the term? Friend Zoned means that you like someone romantically but they say (and most of us have heard this at some time or other) " I really like you ...but only as a friend"

Being friend zoned is not easy for any of the people involved.... but it doesn't have to mean the end of a friendship. Although dealing with the feelings can be hard - this is just another important skill to learn as we move through life.

Recently I came across this nice article on being 'friendzoned' on the Scarleteen website. Have a read. It may give you some ideas when working with young people around this issue

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Slut Shaming and it's effect

Great article on the effects of slut shaming from takepart.com

When young men and women are made to feel shameful about their sexual behavior, they naturally become reticent to seek advice about sex. Though the subject is not very well-studied, we know from research that emotional distress among adolescent girls is linked to earlier sexual activity, risky sexual partners, and getting infected with an STD. The medical literature also includes research linking poor self-esteem to riskier sexual behavior, while "sexual self-efficacy"—feeling in control of your body and your decisions about sex, including feeling comfortable saying no to a potential partner—was correlated to a lower likelihood of doing risky things that would make someone more likely to contract an infection.

CLICK HERE to read more.

Intersexion

Bfriend in Adelaide

Bfriend’s What’s on in GLBT Adelaide information evening will be held on Thursday 16 May (so only three days away now), from 6.00 to 8.00pm, on the first floor of the Uniting Communities building at 10 Pitt Street in the city.

Speakers will be representatives from

• The Golden Club

• Man Tag

• Samesex Dancesport SA

• Gay, Lesbian Qwire

• Unity and Friends / Trinity Sistas / Queer Straight Alliance Youth

• Happy Wanderers

• Team Adelaide

So this is a reminder if you haven’t RSVP’d but intend to come (please do so) ... and if you have already RSVP’d, thanks, and we’ll see you on Thursday evening.

Refreshments will be served!

The Bfriend Team

Bfriend

Uniting Communities10 Pitt Street, ADELAIDE SA 5000

Ph: Women's Worker  -  8202 5805  /  Men's Worker  -  8202 5192          

Email: bfriend@unitingcommunities.org

Web: www.unitingcommunities.org

FRESH youth focus for JUNE.

The next FRESH youth focus 3 day workshop is being held June 17/18/19 at ShineSA Woodville.

FRESH provides opportunities for workers to explore their own attitudes towards sexual health and relationships education so that they will be better placed to support their clients to make sense of their sexual world.

FRESH aims to provide workers with an increased level of knowledge and confidence when working with clients and colleagues in the area of sexual and reproductive health and relationships education. Many course activities and resources can be adapted for use with one-to-one clients and community groups.

Topics in this interactive course include:

• Sexuality & Sexual Health
• Sex & the Law
• Sexual Diversity
• Gender & Power
• Sexual Violence
• Contraception & Pregnancy Options
• Safer Sex & Sexually Transmitted Infections
   Bringing up the conversation
• Using education resources
• Sexual Wellbeing
and lots more



CLICK HERE to enrol

Teen wheel of dating violence

If you have never seen the 'power and control' wheel that is often used when working with perpetrators of violence you may want to go here to have a look at this 'wheel' in a specific setting designed to work with teens.
This is an easy to use tool when working with young people - it's visual and interesting and interactive.. Have a look.

Pressure re anal play

Great discussion from the Centre for Sexual Pleasure and Health bringing up an issue that many people find hard to discuss.

I know you guys give lots of great advice about anal play.  However, lately I’ve been wondering if anal is something I really want to do, or if I want to do it only because I’ve gotten so much pressure from partners to do it.  How do I deal with the pressure?

Ahh, yes, the classic “what came first: the chicken or the egg?” dilemma, this time with a naughty twist.  In many avenues of life, it can be difficult if not impossible to separate where the influence of interpersonal relationships as well as society at large ends and where our own desires begin.  Such things often cannot be separated in easy, neat packages– after all, society’s influence begins from birth.  Besides, simply because something came about as a result of external influences and even pressure, it doesn’t mean we can’t and don’t enjoy such practices and behaviors.  In light of this, I’m prone to encouraging people to do whatever feels good to them within the bounds of consent, regardless of potential external influences.

CLICK HERE to read more.

Body Image and Media responsibility?

Great discussion from greatist.com

This week, news broke that Abercrombie’s CEO Mike Jeffries had no interest in marketing his clothing to plus-size women. In response, media outlets across the globe expressed outrage, some labeling Jeffries an “asshole” for making women feel unwelcome in his store. Almost immediately, a petition appeared on Change.orgasking Jeffries to “stop telling teens they aren’t beautiful.”

The Abercrombie debacle came right on the heels of H&M’s controversial decision to feature a plus-size model, Jennie Runk, in its advertisements. Meanwhile,department stores across North America and Europe have made headlines in the last few months for using mannequins that better resemble real people than Popsicle sticks.

At a time when many people, especially women, suffer from negative body image, all this news points to an essential question: Are marketers and media really responsible for making or breaking our self-esteem?

CLICK HERE to read more.

White Ribbon

Great to see this report on the ABC about White Ribbon Day and the White Ribbon Conference.
1 woman dies each week in Australia because of relationship violence. The risk of this violence increases when a woman is pregnant.
THIS IS CRAZY. We all have an ethical responsibility to speak out when we hear about or see violence against women. This doesn't matter if it is something we see online or in front of us in real time. No more are all of us able to be a passive bystander.
Sexual health includes relationship work and gendered oppression. If you see something speak up.