Young men as victims of relationship violence

This is a pretty hard discussion to have.

We know that overwhelmingly women are the victims of male perpetrators of violence; however hat should not stop us from looking at young men as victims as well.

In some of my recent work I was talking to a group of 15 to 16 year old young men. In a group of 9 people,  6 of these young men had been slapped by their girlfriends at some stage in their relationship, they also spoke of being kicked and punched in the arm. NOT ONE of these young men believed that this was relationship violence. They believed it was a perfectly normal way for young girls to treat young  men. Not only that but each of these young men believed that to retaliate would have been un-manly and weak. They believed that it was their duty to put up with this. By having this discussion I know that some will think that by looking in to this we diminish the impact that relationship violence has on women. That by having this conversation we disregard the women's experience of relationship violence. My thought is that men and women experience relationship violence differently - It is not a competetion to see who suffers most. This is an attempt to bring ALL dark things into the light for better examination.

In a paper published by the Australian Domestic Violence Clearing House Titled 'Men as Victims Of Domestic Violence' they said this:


Responding to domestic violence effectively requires an analysis of domestic  violence that incorporates gender.  This has been essential to naming violence and  being clear about the causes of violence and who is responsible for abuse largely  targeted at women and their children.  Much data have been collected that confirms  that women, in the overwhelming majority of cases, are the victims of violence from a  partner (Egger 1995).  An emerging question raised within the field is, “What about  the men who are also victims of domestic violence?”  To date there is little statistical  data recording men as victims, either within Australia or overseas.  This paper  examines the available data about male victims of domestic violence.  It also discusses what is known about men’s experiences of domestic violence and the implications for service providers. GO HERE TO READ MORE

It is time for all of us to look at relationship violence in all of its forms. Address it and work on eradicating any violence from the relationships that we all deserve.